PSA: You. Can. Take. A. Break. From. Personal. Development.

I was talking to a friend who is constantly learning, healing, growing, developing himself, and "doing the work"

We were also talking about how he has no social life.

He's been burned by people who "aren't into" what he's into and he feels rejected by them when he talks about what he's been working on and how it's changed his life.

This is one of the most common pitfalls of the personal development industry: no one is teaching how to communicate the development and integrate it into everyday life.

My friend has worked so hard to get what he wanted. He developed more self-awareness, more depth, and more dynamic interests because he expanded his mind.

But when it came to integrating what he learned in social settings, there was a deep fear of rejection. He fears what his coworkers, old friends, family members, etc think to the point of actually withdrawing from them even more. 

Isn’t the point of doing all this work to be more fully connected to ourselves and others?

So, I told him about how I take long breaks from spiritual and personal development to integrate. I put everything down, even my journal, and focus on things outside of personal development. 

I told him I believe that by simply waking up and experiencing life, I am personally developing.

So he tried taking a break from it all.

Yesterday he told me he had an amazing conversation with his boss about the universe, his meditation, quantum physics, and consciousness.

He said it was interesting to have that deep-dive conversation with someone and see that his boss was not only receptive to what he was saying but also had his own experiences to share. 

The importance of taking a break from the self-work and coming back to this world is seeing and feeling how all the work you’ve done has impacted you. The wisdom that has been gleaned from your lived experiences can’t be necessarily seen from your perspective of yourself, it’s experienced and reflected to you by interacting with others. 

Integration and sharing with the world the self-work come in many forms. 

Communication, music, art, creativity, writing, new projects, or maybe the urge to go on an adventure. 

Personal development, in my opinion, is meant to get us INTO the world and fearlessly express ourselves. To see and experience the vastness of our connection to the world, ourselves, and others. 

You can’t integrate if you’re constantly drinking from the water-hose of self-help. 

Take a break, the books will be there when you get back from your adventure :)